


not without you

by orphan_account



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-20
Updated: 2015-05-20
Packaged: 2018-03-31 11:31:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3976501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky falls and Steve lets go.  But this isn’t the end for Captain America and his plucky sidekick…</p>
            </blockquote>





	not without you

In the same instant as Bucky’s hold on the rail slips and he falls, scrambling for purchase on something, _anything_ , Steve decides that his mission isn’t worth completing and the war isn’t worth fighting anymore if he doesn’t have his best friend by his side and watching his back.

And so Steve Rogers, also known as Captain America, makes the conscious decision to let go.

He plummets after Bucky, quickly catching him up due in equal parts to his momentum and the serum-induced weight gain that propels him. His arms reach for Bucky and pull him in, cradling the other man against his chest and angling his body so that the ground will impact him first and Bucky second.

By some miraculous stroke of luck, their fall is cushioned by the deepest snow bank known to mankind. As he intended, Steve lands first and although Bucky’s weight is crushing him, the overwhelming relief that Steve experiences at feeling Bucky’s chest rise and fall against his own far outweighs the discomfort.

They remain that way — Bucky draped over Steve, unmoving apart from the shallow breaths reassuring Steve that his leap of faith was not unfounded — for what could be minutes or hours; Steve loses track of the time. All that matters to him is that his best friend still breathes; the man who’s been the center of Steve’s universe for innumerable years is still there, solid and real and _alive_.

“Why’d you do that, punk?” Bucky finally manages to gasp out.

“Jerk,” Steve mumbles in response as he finds the wherewithal to wrap his arms around Bucky, one hand pressed between his shoulder blades and the other firmly planted at the small of his back. They settle into their new positions and remain unmoving for many minutes, simply trying to get their breath back and accept the fact that they are somehow still alive.

While neither is entirely surprised by Steve’s survival, Bucky can’t help but wonder at the guardian angel who must surely be watching over him. What other explanation is there? Even Steve, with his super-soldier strength, couldn’t have known that shielding Bucky’s body with his own would ensure their survival, falling as they were from such a great height.

Steve takes a single rattling breath and knows instantly that his ribs, unsurprisingly, are bruised from the fall, if not broken. Nonetheless, he struggles to answer Bucky and try to convey what losing him would have meant to Steve.

“You were prepared to die for me, Buck. How could I do no less?” he says, slowly. “I couldn’t have lived with myself if you fell and I did nothing, just watched and let it happen. . . Bucky, if you had fallen and died, I would have been right behind you, one way or another. There ain’t no me if there ain’t no you. I’m with you till the end of the line.”

And somehow, following his impassioned declaration, it seems the most natural thing in the world for Steve to angle his head so that his and Bucky’s lips are brushing ever-so gently together. Yet rather than push him away as Steve was expecting, Bucky instead chooses to deepen the kiss, plunging his tongue into the warm, wet cavern of Steve’s willing and all-too eager mouth. Though it may merely be a reaffirmation that they’re still alive, a benediction perhaps, Steve will take what he can get. He’s wanted this for far too long to not give it his all while he has the chance.

“Ya mind telling me what that was all about?” asks Bucky when they come up for air.

“I love you, Bucky. And I figure that any moment could be our last, so I’m gonna to live for the moment and seize the day. If I’m meant to die, then I don’t plan on going with any regrets.”

Bucky starts to laugh, whether because what Steve said was truly humorous or he’s delirious from the stress of their situation. Steve’s just about ready to get mad when Bucky clarifies what’s so funny. “I love you too, punk. I was always just too scared to say anything. With the kind of world we live in — not to mention the kind of neighborhood we live in — I didn’t want to do anything that would put you at risk when you were already a puny, sickly shrimp.”

“Glad you didn’t get personal,” Steve huffs.

“Oh, you know what I mean, Stevie,” says Bucky, fake-glaring at him. “I’ve loved you since before you became all big and muscly, all the way back to when we were teens. So you don’t have to worry about me liking you for your looks alone. Though I must say — you pull off the hunk-look extremely well. I don’t blame Agent Carter for throwing herself at you!”

“Be nice, Buck,” Steve warns him. “We can argue semantics later. Right now we need to get outta here. I don’t fancy having Zola stumble upon us, weak and vulnerable as we are.”

“Speak for yourself, buddy.” Bucky gets up and brushes a dusting of snow off his jacket. “You’re the Star-Spangled Man with a Plan. What do we do?”

Steve’s plan, as it turns out, is to travel by night to avoid detection and thereby slowly make their way back to camp. Their days are spent huddling together for warmth, while at night they stumble around in the dark, trying to find their way home. Through it all, though, Steve never once lets go of Bucky’s hand. He already lost his friend to Zola once before; he refuses to lose Bucky a second time. Eventually they stagger in to camp to find themselves being hailed as heroes, for while they had been lost in the woods, the remaining Howling Commandos had succeeded in taking out Zola.

Steve and Bucky’s happiness at being alive and together is short-lived, though, for only a few weeks later they find themselves face-to-face with Schmidt again, this time on a plane-carrier heading straight for New York City.

With Schmidt dispatched, Steve takes the wheel, dipping the plane’s nose down towards the ice below them. “Get outta here, Buck,” he orders tersely, sparing his lover a fleeting and heart-rending look. “Save yourself!”

“Are you goddamn kidding me?” Bucky yells over the roar of the plane’s engines. “I didn’t spend years at your bedside wonderin’ if you would live or die to desert you now. If we go we go together.”

“Have it your own way,” says Steve with a sigh of resignation that, to Bucky’s ears, sounds more like gratitude that he won’t be left to die alone. “Get over here.”

Now being the smaller of the two, Bucky settles himself on Steve’s lap, slipping an arm around the taller man’s shoulders. “Never thought we’d go like this,” he casually remarks.

“If I have to go, then I’m glad it’s with you. There’s no-one I’d rather be with at the end of all things, Buck. I love you.”

The pair has just enough time for one last desperate kiss before their plane makes contact with the icy surface of the Arctic, knocking Steve and Bucky’s heads together against the control panel. The last thing they’re aware of, before darkness takes them, is the steady pressure and reassuring warmth of fingers twined tightly together.

When they’re dug out of the ice close to a century later, they’re found with a smile on their face.


End file.
